Letter Before Hell

My Love, I hope this finds you well
There are some things that I should tell
I do hope that you’ll read this through
I wish you’d keep this, I wish you do
If hell is a place for people like me
Might as well I tell you thee
Before I go you need to know
The things I feel but didn’t show
My love is yours and yours alone
A love so deep I could have shown
Now all I can do is write you this
Surely that I’ll truly miss
Those sweet eyes I refused to look
Those sweet smiles that caught me like a hook
Your face so perfect I couldn’t dare touch
This thing I feel it’s all too much
I regret all the chances I didn’t take
All the memories we could’ve made
In this letter I bid my farewell
For my life is done, I’m going on a trip to hell

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My Crissa Family

Dancing has always been my passion. It sucks the stress out of me and it lightens my heart to jive with the beat and dance my heart out. Other than writing, this has been my way of expressing myself and letting out my frustrations. I dance when i’m happy and i dance when i’m sad. This has been my comfort zone. Every step has a meaning, and every routine has a story.

I have started dancing when i was 5. I started with the cultural dances and as i grew up, i have opened my eyes, widened my perspective and explored the beautiful world of dance. I discovered a lot of styles that i never knew i’d be able to relate to. I stared learning and later on came to embrace it. With this I have found where I belong, a taste of ecstasy and thrill whenever I am on stage.

The feeling of performing is so heartwarming. Seeing the people smile while we dance just gives me joy. The sweat and tiring practices are so much worth it. True, as a dancer you don’t get that much benefit but it makes us healthy! And happy! This year I have met this beautiful family of mine, this lineup full of witty, intimidating but oh so talented girls and had the opportunity to compete for regionals with them. There were struggles during the training yet we settled our differences and conquered the stage. We made it through nationals! Yay! I’m so glad I met them they made me so happy. I didn’t only find friends and dance buddies, but I found a family.

 

All Alone

she’s living in a tree of loneliness
something’s staying away, her happiness
she awaits to hear a melody
but whatever she does
her life is still in melancholy
what has she done so wrong
to experience sadness for so long
trying to find the right path
her problems much harder than math
as her directions were left astray
she was left there to stay
all alone she went through her journey
stood bravely with all the burdens she carry

Til Next Time

Til next time my dear

Hopefully when things are clear

When i finally got rid of my fear

I wish you’d be near

 

Til next time my love

My god sent gift from above

I’ll let you fly like a dove

You’re the only thing i ever wished to have

 

Til next time my boo

I wish what we had was true

When you told me “i love you”

I should’ve said “i love you too”

 

Til next time my sweetheart

I did not wish for us to part

I may have pushed you like a cart

Bear in mind you’ll always be in my heart

 

 

Farewell

I really thought it was you

But it was too good to be true

I gave you my all

Though at first i was afraid to fall

For the months we spent together

What i felt for you grew deeper and deeper

Yet everytime you say “i love you”

I say “No, that’s just infatuation for you”

You can’t blame me for my decisions

For your words don’t coincide with your actions

I really thought this was my second shot on love

My prayers answered from up above

But then things then took a turn

Now i guess you’re just another picture to burn

Burn to dust it’s such a shame

For my heart still calls for your name

Baby don’t worry I’ll be fine

Cause i know from the start you weren’t mine

I kept an open mind that this day shall come

And my heart rumbles like the beat o the drum

Maybe now’s just not our time

For our words don’t seem to rhyme

Or maybe you’re just not meant for me

Let’s leave it all to destiny

I hope someday when i’m completely gone

You would say

“How could i let her go?

She was the one.”

Make Believe

You lured me in with your lies

Captured me with your confidence

Tricked me with your gestures

Made me fall over the fence

Your smart moth leading of misunderstandings

For i push you away because of the silly things

You’re like bubble and mushroom

You pop in and out of my life

Mind you i’m not that patient

To be waiting for you whenever you like

Like scrabble letters your mind’s messed up

I’m not really sure if you want this or not

Exclusive, that’s what we are

I get that, i know that

But something’s bugging me behind bar

You told me you love me

I told you it wasn’t true

For it’s easier to believe

In “i like you” than “i love you”

The things i know i’m afraid to tell

I might hurt your feelings with the words i can’t even spell

Dying to know, afraid to find out

That’s how i feel on the things they talk about

Is this true?

Is this real for you?

I’m so confused, what should i do?

I don’t even know what i feel for you

All i know is that i’m afraid, terrified

For i’m not ready to lose you

Is this just make believe

Are you playing a game

Please tell me

I don’t wanna put myself to shame

 

This is for you, woman! 

Woman, when will you learn?

The world isn’t constant.

People come and go.

Stop putting your heart out on someone who doesn’t even know what the word “consistency” means.

Stop risking it all for someone who’s wvwn afraid to fall off the chair.

Stop wasting your time on someone who can’t even make time for you.

Stop.

Just stop.

To my Uncle..

If i were to laugh it’d be at your jokes

If i were to eat something it’d be ginabot

If i were to choose a place it’d be your house and

If i were to choose my favorite person it’d be you
Life’s too unfair and fate’s too unpredictable

It’s depressing and way too frustrating

Time’s gonna make you wish it was longer

And memories will make you cry at night wishing they were real
If i could only go back to the last time we talked

I would’ve said the words i’ve never uttered before

I would’ve hugged you so tight that you’d burst

And i would’ve thanked you for everything you’ve done for me

The Ocean and The Stars

 

The ocean is quiet tonight
Stars are not shining bright
Everything is but a standstill of doubts and lies
Confusing at times like the question of tides
But it is still beautiful tonight
And everything is just alright
You’re far and far and ocean keeps us apart
It does not mean that i will not do my part
These tides are but flow that come and go
What matters is what to show
Let me be your message in a bottle
For you to call when everything is but a shackle
Give me your pain and sorrow
And i will give you the hope of tomorrow
I believe in you with my love, trust and loyalty
With no regret, suffering nor pity
To show only respect rather than utter contempt
Forgive me for my attempt
But you have me, everything and mine
And i don’t want you to keep in line
You’re as free as the sea
I will not beg and plea
Take me when you’re ready
And all would be a remedy
The ocean is quiet tonight
Stars are not shining bright
The quiet is beautiful
And the bright is truthful
Give me what is yours to give
And we will surely live
Let me be your message in a bottle every night
When you are at the shores in you every right